Seeds for 11/17/2023 - Matthew 19:7-10
Scripture: “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?”
Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
The disciples said to Him, “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry.”
Observation: Yesterday, we saw that in the previous verses, Jesus grounded the conversation in a scriptural foundation and brought forth the normative pattern for marriage of male and female, in a covenant that is the work of God as much or more than as the work of either human party. If a set of promises are made before God and the congregation, then we are asking God to create this union and not only ourselves.
So, divorce is not appropriate for “any and every reason.”
Having taken a strong stance against divorce, Jesus is asked why Moses permitted it. This seems like a fair question and Jesus has a response.
Audience matters. Who Jesus is addressing here? “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives…” He’s speaking to the husbands, which suggests that the agency regarding marriage and divorce in ancient Israel (and possibly the known neighboring cultures and societies) laid squarely with the men.
Jesus’ answer for why divorce was permitted in the Torah is the hard-heartedness of humans. Divorce is not God’s design for what marriage ought to be. Human fallenness being what it is, however, something could go wrong. Someone would be unable or unwilling to honor the marriage covenant. As a clergy friend once said, “Ultimately, the only reason a marriage continues is because both people decide to stay married.” Both parties must want the union.
The Pharisees originally asked Jesus if it was lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason. For Christians, then, the hardheartedness of humans is not a blank check for divorce. Jesus hems this in with a reason that He deems sufficient to allow for divorce—unfaithfulness.
Remembering that this teaching is aimed at the husbands, we see that this stricter standard would have functioned to protect women in a culture where being discarded at the whims of one’s husband would have been dangerous indeed. Our own North American context, though imperfect, is thankfully not like that, so when a woman is endangered by remaining with an abusive husband, there’s nothing Biblical about using this ethic to keep her in a harmful situation. Jesus’ command functioned to protect women. Any perspective on divorce that begins with the Biblical Christian ideal and holds marriage in high esteem cannot also function at cross-purposes with the intended result of Jesus’ command here in Matthew.
Once again, Jesus raises the standard for Christians. Not just any reason will do when it comes to divorce, which is a tragic result of hardened human hearts. The raised standard both honors the theological significance of marriage and protects the more vulnerable party in the marriage. These principles would anchor us today as well.
Application:
If you are married, what helps you actively strengthen your marriage?
What else might the Holy Spirit be speaking with you about in the text today?
Prayer: Lord, keep my heart soft and my whole self faithful. Amen.
“But the seed falling on good soil refers to someone who hears the word and understands it. This is the one who produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown.” (Matthew 13:23)
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